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Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Methods to build self esteem in anyone.

There are many ways to build self esteem in anyone, and there is actually a sort of shopping list of things you can do to reach into your personality and up the level of your self esteem. People with low self esteem are easily recognisable, they often shy away from social situations because they think that they are not good enough to be in the circle, they often avoid things like confrontations with other people because they often feel they do not have the skill sets or the confidence necessary to take on other people.

They also feel that they do not have the ability to be as confident or as gung ho as other people, and they will often avoid situations where they might be rejected or failure might be an option. One thing you need to understand is that these people do not want to be in that percentile of people, but they want to be more self confident and take on the world like a tiger. So what you need to do if you think that you have a low self esteem problem? There are ways you can take stock of the situation and improve yourself and this article will show you some simple things that you can do in order for you do achieve this.

One of the things that you may want to consider is taking a deep breath, which is quite important in regards to taking the first step to much better self esteem. Take a deep breath and relax, understand that you need to breathe in and look at the bigger picture. Next thing you need to do is to make a list of the gifts and strengths that you already have. You can ask other people that you know, your loved ones and the people close to you to help you with this list.

You cannot trust yourself to build this list, because your own ideas will get in the way. You need to be able to get outside opinion. This list is the feel good list that you need to take stock of who you are and what people think are your strengths. The other thing you need to do is to realise the limits that you have as a person and understand that these are realistic limits. If you are not a borne genius in mathematics you do not keep telling yourself that need to prove yourself in this area.

With this you can stop putting yourself down and understand that your strength lies in other places. You can then pursue the strengths that you know you have, so you would not be able to keep getting disappointed as well. Once you are able to succeed in anything or have an achievement, you will then celebrate and use these small victories as anchors to increase your self esteem. With these methods, anyone can simply build themselves step by step and block by block and have more self confidence.

Benefits of motivation Exercise.

Motivation is that which drives a person to attain a goal or realize a dream. Whatever your goals are in life and whatever your motivational factors are, performing a motivation exercise can help you stay inspired and on track. Life is filled with stressful moments and sometimes, they can overwhelm you and make you feel like giving up on your goals. Unfortunately, there is no wonder drug to produce motivation. It simply has to come from within a person. However, there are many ways to inspire motivation such as a motivation exercise that help deal with the unconstructive forces in life.

One good example of a motivation exercise is known as “creative visualization”. You can do this anytime and wherever you might be. This motivation exercise simply involves creating a mental picture of yourself realizing your dreams. Feel free to be as detailed with your visualization. By holding onto the mental picture that you have created and using it in your daily life, you can motivate yourself to work for your dreams.

Verbal affirmation is another motivation exercise that works well with creative visualization. The power of words has long been proven and pronouncing your success strengthens your vision even more. Once you have captured your vision, affirm it. When you speak positive and encouraging words to yourself, you become empowered.

An essential motivation exercise when setting your goals is to write them down. This helps you to understand fully what it is you are trying to achieve. It is hard to become motivated when your goals are not clear to you .So make sure to practice this motivation exercise with every new goal you have. Having a written statement of your goals also allows you to go over them at a later time, which is important because changes happen all the time that you may need to adjust your goals.

In addition, be sure to write down your reasons behind your goals. Why do you want to achieve them? This is important because life can throw blows at your plans that can dampen your spirit. Having something tangible to remind you of your reasons is a great way to gain back your motivation.

Recording your progress in a journal is another excellent way to stay motivated. When you are going through a rough time, you can look back at what you have already achieved and realize that quitting is certainly not worth it.The above exercises are simple but effective ways to get you started on your dreams and keep you going when you are running out of fuel. Begin with even just one motivation exercise and be inspired.

Increase your intelligence and social standing.

How can it be that after years of hard work and expertise in my line of work, I still seem to be at a dead spot in my career? Well this happens to a lot of hard working men and women. This has nothing to do with not being smart enough or not having enough knowledge, this has to do with how we train our brain. So how to increase intelligence should be your question.

Self doubt has nothing to do with it. You see many people do the same thing day-in and day-out, and that becomes a routine. Now routine is something we do on autopilot. How many times have you told yourself; “I can do this with my eyes closed”? Well, that is the start of your problem right there. But how do we grow when our lives are so monotone?

What you need to learn is how to improve concentration. This is something that will help you go further in your job, and this will also give you the feeling of achievement. When we look at your question on how it can be that you are still stuck at your job, we can clearly see that the underlying problem is your fear of not being able to accomplish personal achievements. This is often seen in many people, and it will also reflect on your social standing. This simply because when you don’t feel that you are all you can be, then this is something other people, and defiantly your boss will interpret as not being able to go that extra mile.

Therefore, the next step is learning to increase iq to be able to multitask quicker, and be on the ball more often. This will help you feel better about yourself and your job, and this will also be seen by your direct environment. So the next time you have an office party and people are having a laugh and a good time, you will find yourself right in the middle of conversation. This would be your situation opposite to standing on the outside. or even worse yet, feeling on the outside. But how do you increase iq?

We have developed a new program that will help you focus, and that will stimulate your brain waves. This program is very easy to follow and does not take forever to start showing results. It is a well known fact that with this program, a lot of new links are laid inside your brain. You can almost compare it to a new super highway. It can take way more traffic and does not get overloaded. This program makes the electric current that is used by our brain to transport information and decode that information, speed up in an immense way. So when you are at that next party, or simply your next boardroom meeting, would it not be great to be the one that has the answers first? The potential is already inside you, you just need to unlock it!

Making your immagination work at your advantage.

In Napoleon Hill’s classic book Think and Grow Rich, it explains that there are two proficiencies of imagination namely, creative imagination and synthetic imagination. Also, as outlined by Denis Waitley in his Seeds of Greatness, it becomes significant and essential to learn precisely how every aptitude works and know that one is hugely a component of the right brain hemisphere and one a component of the left brain hemisphere. To be a big success in the business field or any other areas, the imagination in focused and concentrated use is necessary. To be able to take advantage from this extraordinary and special ability which we all inherently have, we need to understand completely, and then enhance our thoughts.

As business minded individuals, we became so highly skilled and proficient in performing from the left side (the analytical, logical) of our brain, that we might be in danger of under utilizing our right side (the artistic, intuitive) part of our brain. That is why scientists these days agree that the roles and duties of the brain can’t be simply divided as left-or right brain. Creative or artistic Imagination. When we receive some “inspiration” and “hunches”, it is through the faculties of our creative imagination that carry them out. This creative or artistic faculty becomes more mentally responsive and alert in relation to its development through constant use and practice.

It automatically works when our conscious mind works at an extremely fast-moving rate and when it is stimulated through the feeling or emotion of strong desire. By using this creative imagination, leaders and pioneers in finance, business, industry as well as famous and illustrious poets, artists, musicians and writers become great and hugely successful. Synthetic Imagination—this specific innate power of one’s mind works with the material of observation, experience and education, with which it is being fed. It merely classifies and arranges prior know-how and expertise: ideas, plan or concepts into new and fresh combinations. It is utilized by many innovative thinkers and inventors whereas the genius draws upon the innovativeness on the creative ingenious side where it can’t solve problems through the synthetic imagination.

Mastering your very own creativity. So many years ago, we were more intuitive and more emotional, but as we know and learned to use different tools, and to communicate verbally, we changed or altered our state. All of us need to do to uncover and explore our own creativity and attain maximum advantage from our innovative thoughts is to be “whole-brain” thinkers. We enhanced and progressed into a “left-brain” society by using logic, verbalism and problem solving in a practical manner. To be more proficient and highly skilled in the building and stretching of our whole imagination and especially our inventiveness in the creative side, the basic key is in cultivating the right-brain function-our spontaneous emotions and our very own intuition.

Only then we would be more well-rounded in our approach to business and life and therefore gain the added bonus that only our creative imagination can provide.

Huge success through being creative.

Do you love to be creative, but want to take your creativity to a whole new level? Do you feel overwhelmed by your work and find that your natural creative abilities and talents are untapped? If so, you need to learn how to tap into your creativity whenever you want or need to. When you allow creative thinking to flow, you will find that you can enhance your natural abilities and accomplish more in less time.

Creative Thinking Gives You Freedom:

Creativity allows you to become who you want to be. If you cannot release your creativity, you may feel you are not growing personally, or you may not be able to think as clearly as you would like to. Many people don't realize the importance of creativity until they are taught to tap into it through creative thinking. Once you tap into that creative mind, the ideas and thoughts are endless!

To get started, you can begin with some simple steps like going through magazines and cutting out random images. You then can glue them all to a paper or a board without thinking about it – just let your creative juices flow! You can even make this a vision board with all the things you want for yourself on that board. Finally, step back and see what your mind has created. You may be impressed and surprised with yourself. This surely will help you tap into your creative energy.

Listen to Something New

Another way to jump-start your creative thinking is by listening to music. Put on an album that you are unfamiliar with or borrow a friend's CD. When you listen to something that you have never experienced before, you may find that you are changing your definitions of creativity and are lighting your creative fire at the same time.

Get Creative – Get out and Boogie!

Dance! Creative thinking often starts with an active body. Put on a CD or go out to a jazz club. Try a dance class, or enjoy the movement of your body in your own living room. Whatever it is, do something to get up and get going! You will be surprised at how creative you'll feel afterwards. You may feel inspired and ready to tackle new and exciting projects. Or perhaps you'll find that your workload isn't as daunting as it first appeared. After all, you'll be relaxing while having fun!

Write Your Heart Out

Another option is to set your timer for 15 minutes. From the minute you press start, you should write freely. Write whatever comes to mind without thinking about it or planning. Then step back and see the creativity that flowed from your mind to your hand, and then to your pen and onto the paper.

Yet another awesome way to boost creative thinking is through affirmations. These positive statements can help you remember what it is to be creative and how wondrous it feels when creativity flows through you. You can create a list of affirmations for yourself such as, "I feel an intense flame of passion for things that interest me," that can help you tap into the creative person that you are, even as you deal with everyday stresses.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Reach For The Stars!

“If you can dream it, you can do it.” Walt Disney“Whatever you can do, or believe you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I love the phrase “Reach for the Stars!” It conjures up images for me of magic and seems to open the doorway to amazing possibilities. We typically are not taught to reach for the stars. We are not encouraged to dream big dreams. We are for the most part taught to instead keep our dreams small and contained—following the typical societal roadmap for success: go to college in an area that you can make money, maybe in an area you enjoy—and then pursue this career path, find a life partner, possibly have a family. This is not bad—it may even lead to an enjoyable life—but what if there was more?

What if there was a door beyond your current thinking that took you to a place that was a life you thought you could only dream about? What if the only way you could get there was to first believe it is even there to begin with? Could you open up to this idea—or does a negative voice shoot this down “Yeah, right—me living a big dream—fat chance!”

We all have conditioned thought patterns that dictate how we perceive the world around us and what possibilities are open to us and which are not. These thought patterns are handed down to us from generation to generation. If your parents lived their dreams and were filled with joy and fulfillment, then you probably inherited some thought patterns that will lead to the same experience for you. But if your parents were unhappy and struggled with fear, addictions, lack of purpose, lack of deep connection with others than watch out---your inherited conditioned thought patterns may be hazardous to your Life!

The interesting thing about these thought patterns are that they are invisible to us. They are so much a part of us that they feel normal and we don’t even notice the ways they are limiting our life. You are probably even shaking your head right now wondering “What is she talking about?”

The signs that you are under the influence of these limiting patterns can be one or more of the following:a sense that there is something more to life, that there is something missingfeelings of depression and hopelessness about life---what is the pointfeelings of envy or jealousy about the lives of other people “I wish my life could be more like that”lack of Joy and excitementlack of deep fulfillment and satisfaction with lifelack of deep connection with yourself and otherslack of a sense of a larger purpose for your lifelack of a sense of spirituality and feeling of spiritual connection

What is sad is that there is amazing potential that lies in each and every one of us---but so little of it is fully realized because of these limiting thought patterns. If you are feeling some of the things I listed above it is a signal that there is more in life awaiting you. These feelings are indicating that conditioned thought patterns are holding you back from more that is wanting to be expressed inside of you.

Your essential self, your authentic self came into the world to fully express it’s unique creativity and gifts. Imagine the incredible, vital energy of your authentic self hitting the conditioned thoughts of your family –bumping up against thoughts like “You aren’t talented” “Just get a good job and build security—that is what is important” “Don’t rock the boat—keep safe—don’t upset anyone” “Be a good girl/boy and do what I expect and want you to do” “You’re not anyone special” or thoughts about life in general like “Life is struggle—work hard and maybe you will have some enjoyment in retirement” “Life is not meant to be fun—just get through it” “Don’t expect so much, be happy with what you have” “You can’t pursue your dreams AND make money”.

Do you notice any of these messages from your own life? Some of these messages are given directly and some are conveyed through what you saw your parents experience in life and the choices they made. An example could be “Dad stayed at the same job for 40 years even though he hated every minute of it.” Let’s look at all of the messages you would receive if you observed your parent doing this:1. It is OK to stay in a job that you don’t like for the security 2. It’s not OK to take risks—don’t rock the boat—don’t risk 3. Your happiness is not important 4. How you spend the majority of your time doesn’t matter—as long as you are making money 5. Life is not about being happy 6. It is good to sacrifice your happiness for others. These messages can have an impact on you that you are aware of like “My Dad was stuck in a job he didn’t like—I will never let that happen to me.” So you make a conscious choice to break out of that pattern. But what about the unconscious impact?

What I think is most interesting is the messages that we have absorbed that we are NOT conscious of and how these affect our everyday life and choices. We need to watch for this the most—because these unconscious thought patterns will affect us and limit all that we are capabable of accomplishing in our life. Use the signals above as a guide to let you know if these unconscious patterns are limiting you. If you are feeling incredibly happy, joyful, on purpose and are feeling vibrantly alive -than you are fine---these limiting patterns are probably not operating in your life. If you are feeling some of the feelings listed above than the following tips to break out of these patterns will be helpful.

How to Break Free from Limiting Patterns and Reach for the Stars:Realize that your Limiting Thinking is NOT true- Those limitations and negative thinking has no basis in reality, even though it feels very real. The reason it feels real is because you have been saying these things to yourself for a long time and as a child you probably got this message over and over as well. Remember just because the voice is LOUD does not mean it is TRUE. So your inner message of “I could never do that (your dream), I don’t have what it takes”—is absolutely false. The interesting thing is that what is really true is usually the exact opposite of your limiting thinking. So if you reverse your thought—you will get closer to what is really true. Taking the previous example—if you reversed it—it would be “I could do that (your dream), I absolutely have what it takes!”

If you have the Dream, You have What it Takes to Manifest the Dream- Your dreams are in your heart for a reason-they would not be there if they were not something you were meant to have. They are there to be a beacon, a guide for you to move towards and pursue. Your dreams are not wishful thinking, but important images to pay attention to because they are the guides to the incredible possibilities of your life. If you didn’t have the capability to achieve your dream it would not be in your consciousnesses to begin with. Trust that because it is there, all of the necessary things for its manifestation are present as well. Taking steps towards your dream and trusting that as you do you will get information and inspiration that will lead you to your next step. You don’t need to know the whole outline of how you will achieve the dream before you begin---actually you won’t know the steps until you begin. It is like the information and the steps to manifest the dream are contained in the essence of the dream and will not be revealed until the dream is believed and pursued.

Believe in Your Dreams-- When you were growing up, if your parents didn’t honor and pursue their own dreams- or discounted the dreams you shared with them—you may have learned to do the same thing with your own dreams. Pay attention to your dreams and treat them as beautiful and sacred---honoring them, valuing them and pursuing them. If you can think of the belief in your own dreams as a warm flame that you surround your dream with—warming it, nurturing it and fueling it. We all know people who have dreams in their hearts- but they don’t believe, honor or pursue these dreams. Belief is what activates a dream and acts as a catalyst for its manifestation. Remember the quote by Eleanor Roosevelt “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their own dreams.” Believe in the beauty of your own dreams and take them seriously.

As You Move Towards Your Dream You Will Move Through Fear-- Your conditioned thinking is your comfort zone—these thoughts feel “normal” and familiar to you. As you move towards your dream you will be bumping into your conditioned thinking, which will want to hold you back in your comfort zone. You are moving into new territory and it can be like an alarm goes off in your conditioned thinking saying “Red Alert—we are doing something different, out of our comfort zone, we are in DANGER—we need to stop and go back to safety.” Bob Proctor, a noted life coach, calls this the terror barrier. Many people when they get to this point feel that these uncomfortable feelings are an indicator that they are making a mistake and they stop pursuing their dream. This terror is actually a good thing--- it is letting them know that they are moving out of their limited thinking patterns and into the freedom of living from their true self. When I work with clients I say to them they will probably feel uncomfortable, awkward and scared as they move out of operating from their limiting beliefs—so these feelings are a good thing. If they are feeling comfortable they are probably still in their old patterns and not much will be changing for them. So when you feel the fear or even terror---reassure yourself that this is part of the process and that you are right on track.

Pursuing Your Dream Help you to Grow and Expand-- We are meant to move toward dreams that may initially feel out of our reach because these dreams cause us to stretch, grow and expand into the highest expression of our unique essence. To achieve our dreams we need to move through inner and outer barriers that have kept us living small. As you move through these barriers you will start to feel more energized and confident in all areas of your life. It has a ripple effect of freeing up the energy that was expended keeping you limited. Our fears and limiting thoughts take up a lot of our energy—once this energy is no longer being channeled into limitation---it is available for creativity, joy and achieving your dreams.

The more you feel your own essence and all of the gifts it has to express—you let go of fear even more because you trust that you are bigger, stronger at the level of your Spirit (essence) than you ever knew. When you are living in the walls of your limited conditioning—you feel small and incapable of doing a lot beyond what you have already been doing. Once you break free into a new, expanded experience of you ---you have a greater sense of all that you are really capable of doing.

If You Are Going to Dream, Dream Big-- The bigger the dream, the bigger the growth and expansion you will experience. What I find is that people set their initial dream and as they move towards it they begin to grow, expand and release their limited thinking. Then it is like they are in a new realm of open space and incredible possibilities. It is from this space that there can be even greater clarity about their dreams and oftentimes these dreams will expand and get bigger. It is like their initial dreaming was when they were in the constrictions of their limited thought patterns and they couldn’t access the bigger dream. It may be that the current dream may expand and get bigger or it may shift to a different dream that had never entered their mind before. Example: Audre had always wanted to write professionally—she even had gone to school for creative writing. When she began to dream her dream was to write for a local newspaper and write articles for magazines. As she began to move towards this—she worked through all of the fears and limited thinking that had held her back for years. She began writing every day and submitting her articles for publication. She also took a part-time job as a reporter for a local community newspaper. She felt fabulous and her confidence in her writing grew. She began to access a bigger dream which was to write and publish a novel and to have this become a best-seller. This had never crossed her mind before and it surprised her when it came up. She was able to embrace and honor this dream. She pursued it and felt herself move to a higher level of aliveness, joy and fulfillment than she knew was even possible.

Let Go of What Others Think and Get Positive Support-- To pursue your deepest dreams it is important to let go of what others think of you. Because there are so many people walking around with unlived dreams in their hearts—it is easy for them to project their own limiting thinking on to you. It is important to notice this for what it is and to not take it seriously and buy into their concerns or negativity.

Find people who are dreamers, and more importantly people who are taking their dreams seriously and taking action to achieve these dreams. - Ongoing positive support is essential in reaching your dreams. Find your support through your friendships or through a structured support group. I feel so strongly about the importance of this kind of support that in my practice I have a whole range of services that give people lots of support. You are not meant to do this alone. You need lots of support and the right kind of support---from people who believe in the beauty and possibility of your dreams. You may have not been able to make progress towards your dream for the simple fact you have not had enough support around you.

So begin today to believe in the beauty of your dreams and the incredible possibilities for your life. Take action to move towards these dreams and watch doors open up for you, unique gifts of yours come out— all leading you to life, that until now you have only dreamed about. Believe and it is possible.

Aspire to be yourself.

In the everlasting journey called life, human beings are almost amusing in a strange kind of way. Most people think and believe that they have to “live up” to another family member, relative, or screen idol. Some even have become envious or jealous of popular celebrities and want or even aspire to look, think, and act and be like the famous stars of the silver screen. TV ads and commercials tell us that we “need” those particular services and products to “make” us look better, think better, feel better and smell better. Because of this, some people have become so obsessed in their desire and constant search for perfection that they lose sight of who they really are in the first place.

One of the most unusual ideologies of most individuals is that they truly believe that they could literally “alter” or “transform” themselves into another person. Other societal influence is exhibited and displayed by models and almost perfect celebrities—as they all possess those seemingly unreachable physical attributes, with matching innate self-confidence to boot. But the bottom line is: no one is born perfect and not all actors and models have flawless face and bodies. Not all people are born with fabulous hair and smooth and great skin. So what do we do about it—we improvise and then we compromise. We improvise or experiment with makeup, clothing, products, and services and so on.

We compromise ourselves in the process though, because we become no longer “true” to our inborn natural form. And people who think and feel that they “should” actually alter themselves to look like other person, is moreover an issue of self esteem—or lack of it. The best and most successful goal in life is to “aspire to be yourself.” Okay, now try looking at yourself in the mirror. Ask that person the following questions: 1.) What defines me as a person and what are my goals in life? 2.) What do I want to do and am I happy with my self? 3.) How do I wish others to see me? 4.) What are my aspirations and dreams? 5.) Am I even confident with my self? 6.) Do I really “need” to alter or transform myself? 7.) What more can I do to be happier and most significantly, do I even know where am I going in my life? When you begin to aspire to be you, one does not need to compare for other personalities.

In aspiring to be you, there are no paradoxes. A person has to merely look within to find her/his distinct definition of life and how he/she expresses himself/herself in the community. When you begin to aspire being you, you don not have to be a superhero or a rich and famous celebrity. Just be yourself—in body, mind and spirit. Aspire to be like yourself, the gift of nature to mankind. When you aspire to be you, it is how you present yourself to you, and not defining yourself by becoming somebody else. When you like yourself and find contentment within you, the journey of life would be sailing smooth.